Sunday, November 27, 2011

Holiday’s End

[From an image by Titus Tscharntke.]

Thanks have been given, the turkey consumed. Dwindling days flash by stroboscopically. Trees are bare, but the broken branches piled in the street hold their leaves, remains of the great Halloween blizzard. They shattered loudly, like breaking bones, as they fell. Now they quietly release the pungency of decay. Vegetative rot, the evolutionary ancestor of fleshly decay, rises to the nose. The sharp tang of oak resin sublimates from the ripped wounds. The waxing crescent moon dims into the mist.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Scent Marketing: Selena Gomez Gets Appy

Ingenue places a start-up bet in Postcard on the Run’s $750,000 funding round. (The company’s app lets you print and send postcards of photos from your iOS or Android device.) Her cash is probably not worth as much to the company as her 8,000,000 or so Twitter followers.
Postcard on the Run competes with Postagram and the new Apple Cards. What is Postcard on the Run’s standout feature? Scratch-and-smell scents on your postcards.

No, really. For an extra 50 cents, on top of the usual $1.49, you can embed the scent of sunscreen into the wish-you-were-here card you send from Hawaii. Other fragrances include chocolate, popcorn and holiday spice.
Neato! Postcards are a bit Pony Express, but people still like to stick ‘em on the fridge.

Meanwhile, in St. Petersburg, Florida:
A $2 million renovation of the Mahaffey Theater with features such as air ducts that spray a coconut-mango scent in the lobby was unveiled Wednesday night to civic leaders, city and county officials, the media and invited guests.
Nice. How long before they start tuning the scent to particular acts?

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Snooki the Smellebrity

Okay, it’s pretty easy to parody Calvin Klein perfume ads. Self-parody is more difficult, but I have to admit that Snooki Polizzi pulls it off.

P.S. I know, I know, that’s setting the bar rather low. Still . . . .

P.P.S. C’mon, the pickle scene is funny!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

ISDP: The Downside of Jogging

The gloomy short days of November are upon us—thirteen of them in fact—which means it is time for another lugubrious installment of FirstNerve’s most popular feature. With shrinking daylight and falling temperatures we naturally expected there to be a scarcity of content, so boy were we surprised when we got around to deadline . . .

We begin with a telltale smell in Los Angeles, arising about a mile’s flight of the crow from the interchange of the 5 and 605. Near an abandoned house on a large vacant lot, a buried body calls attention to itself.
“Deputies responded to a jogger’s report of a foul odor in the area,” Lt. Mike Rosson of the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Homicide Bureau said. “They checked the area and found a shallow grave.”
The body, that of a woman, appeared to be partially burned. She became Jane Doe #65. That was on October 15.

Five days later, Phillip Zonkel, a staff writer for LA’s Contra Costa Times, reported that two juveniles—a 15-year-old girl and a 16-year-old boy—were arrested for the murder of a man and woman from Compton. The woman’s body was the one found in Norwalk; the man's was found in a shallow grave in Long Beach, after one of the suspects gave up the location. The arrested girl is apparently related to the murdered couple.

The body of an 80-year-old man from Cape Coral, Florida who had been missing for about a week, was found in a wooded area north of town.
Police say a jogger reported smelling a foul odor in the area Thursday afternoon, prompting a search that led them to the body.
Almost simultaneously, U.S. Marshalls in Chicago arrested a prime suspect in the man’s disappearance—his grandson.

From Kentucky—an ISDP first!—comes bizarre case. Let’s go to the videotape:


JOSH SMITH, anchor:

Reports of a foul odor led investigators to the body of a missing person from Buchanan County Virginia.

Good evening. I’m Josh Smith.

Family members reported 40-year-old Jonathan Looney missing on September 22nd. His body was found last Thursday in his girlfriend’s garage.

11 Connects Reporter George Jackson spoke with Buchanan County Sheriff Ray Foster tonight. George, what did he tell you?


Josh, Kentucky State Police found Looney in the Mouthcard Community of Pike County. That’s about a quarter mile across the Virginia state line.

As we mentioned, they got a tip about a foul odor coming from a garage in the 25-thousand block of South Levisa Road. Buchanan County Sheriff Ray Foster says Looney’s girlfriend, Kristi Slone, lived there. She was home when investigators discovered Looney’s body.

Foster says Slone’s father, William Johnny Slone, was in the home too. Pike County authorities arrested him this May during a large drug roundup.
And from way up in Sauk Rapids, Minnesota: “Cold Spring Woman Charged with Murder after Ex-Husband and Boyfriend Die from Apparent Gunshot Wounds.”

It’s very complicated, but the ex-husband’s remains were found in his apartment after other residents noticed a “foul odor” and notified the landlord, who discovered the body. (The boyfriend’s body was found in a hotel in Ashland, Wisconsin where the woman had been staying.) Both men “were found dead with gunshot wounds to the head, both covered by pillows.”
. . . neighbors said they are constantly reminded of the murder, several days after he was found.

“The doors are open (at the apartment building) because there’s such a horrendous smell. We have to close them at night, but it’s just ... you can’t eat,” [neighbor Roxanne] Huston said.

Near Chicago, the body of a murder victim was found on November 7:
The man’s body was found when workers in the building smelled a foul odor and found the body stuffed in the closet of an apartment, police said.

The body was identified and an arrest made a couple of days later.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Olly Olly Oxen Free

Steve Jobs is said to have been a genius because he designed things consumers didn’t even know they wanted, but then simply had to have. The Olly fits the first part of the equation, but is it a “must have”?

Exit question: What do you call a scented Tweet? A twart? A smeet?

Who Will Watch the Sniffers?

A sad story, but also a bit . . . ironic.

Sunday, November 6, 2011


Even better if true. . . .

Tuesday, November 1, 2011